Live and Learn

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Imagine a school that never closes. One where students learn around the clock. When they want, how they want, and what they want. Well, guess what? That school exists, and every person has access. Welcome back to Element is Everything, the podcast where we explore what it means to find your element, that place where interests and talents collide to help us feel great and to do great. I'm your host, Terry Novichek, and today I'd like to challenge your thinking about school and learning. We all know humans are natural learners. So why do we assume learning ends when school ends? No one went to school to learn how to walk or eat or dress ourselves. We had guidance from adults around us. We fell, we choked, we put our clothes on inside out, and we figured out how to get back up, how to swallow properly, and how to turn our clothes right side out. We struggled, we explored, we conquered, and that is what learning is all about. I'm finding that even homeschool and hybrid school parents are finding themselves wondering, how do I separate home life and school life? And I think we're asking the wrong question here. What we should all be asking is, how can I make sure life and learning are working together? Once upon a time, separating school from home made sense. Schools gave children access to knowledge and skills that many families simply didn't have. Then as society became more complex, schools took on even more responsibility. Today, however, we've begun to assume that learning only happens at school. And that's the belief I'd like to challenge. Even when we sense that the conventional model is no longer serving every student well, many of us continue following those familiar educational paths because they feel safe, they're practical, maybe we even feel like they're required. We send our children to school because we have to, we teach state standards because we have to, we go to college because we have to. And in the meantime, rates of depression, anxiety, and personal debt continue to rise. Sometimes more is not better, and character and social emotional skills cannot be taught through a standardized curriculum. They must be modeled and practiced and reflected on every day. So here's a real life question from a worksheet designed to build character. Here's the scenario. Leo found a shiny red pen on the floor next to his classmate Maya's desk. Maya is absent today. Leo really wants a new pen, and no one else is looking at him. And so then the student is provided with reflection questions. Number one, what is the choice Leo has to make right now? Number two, what are two possible actions that Leo could take? And so the student writes in option A, option B. Number three, how would Maya feel if option A happened? How would she feel if option B happened? Now I'm not saying this isn't good practice, but let's be honest. Even second graders know the teacher isn't hoping Leo keeps the pen. And just because the child writes the correct answer for this scenario, which probably isn't even something in his real life, that doesn't mean he would actually act in that manner if the circumstances presented themselves. What will help children build those skills is to be given responsibility and choices, to practice regular self-reflection of their own real thoughts and actions. Prior to the pandemic, approximately 3-4% of children in the US were homeschooled. That number is now up to nearly 4 million children, roughly 10% of the population. The homeschool population has changed as well, with now 41% coming from non-white and non-Hispanic backgrounds. After nearly 175 years of compulsory education, it has been ingrained in us that school life is different than home life. We have instilled in our children, and we continue to believe as adults, that learning is drudgery, it's mandated, it's done at school, and it must be the same for everyone. Every one of us loved to learn at one point in our life. And those who enjoyed, quote, school continue to love learning. Those who do not or did not enjoy school think they don't enjoy learning. But they do enjoy learning. They just don't enjoy school. We often hear adults say things like, I'm not academic. And that just cracks me up because those are the ones that are usually spending 45 minutes researching the best air fryer or lawn mower or vacation destination or dog food. Or we hear, my child isn't motivated, but yet they can't get them away from the Legos or the dress-up clothes. Or learning is hard. But then those are the ones that are always asking the questions, learning languages, mimicking actions. That's all learning. The children who spends hours mastering Minecraft, baking sourdough, repairing engines, memorizing sports statistics, collecting bugs, taking apart and trying to put back together your computer, creating energy to fuel their toy car or model rocket, creating digital art. They're all learning. My guess is nobody sits a child down with a curriculum called Advanced Minecraft Engineering, yet somehow they learn every crafting recipe known to humankind. On a personal level, I'm thankful for Minecraft because it was the first time I saw my son give a hoot about his spelling and grammar. This was long before we had all the lingo and the acronyms we have today. So he had to spell real words, and he wanted his friends to be able to understand those words and of course not make fun of him. An example of positive peer pressure. Teachers learn from students every day. A retiree dives deep into a new hobby after decades in just one field. A parent learns about child development and patience from their strong-willed toddler. An entrepreneur learns resilience through setbacks. This is not formal education. You're not sitting down with textbooks. You might have the guidance of others, but you're not having to take school to learn these things. The editor of this podcast is a great example of what I'm talking about. She didn't learn podcast editing because someone assigned it to her in a school. She had an interest, she learned about a need, she found people and resources that could help, and she spent countless hours practicing. That is learning in its purest form. Curiosity followed by action. And speaking as the person who sends her less than perfect audio files, I can attest to her skill development. While school is one place where learning can happen, it was never meant to contain all learning. The basic need behind learning is to maintain our existence and to make our way in the world. But now modern society has made survival so much easier. That gives us a lot more time for learning on a higher level and for a deeper purpose. This does not and cannot all be accomplished at school. School, home, the community, the internet, the world, for better or worse, we have to remember these are all the places we learn. Living is learning, and the quality of your learning drives the quality of your life. Learning is not an activity, it is life when we're paying attention. A child helping to prepare dinner learns fractions, chemistry, planning, nutrition, and culture. A family road trip becomes geography, history, economics, and relationship building. A teenager running an online business learns writing, marketing, mathematics, psychology, and customer service. Teenagers permitted to get their driver's license, they learn more than just driving and navigation and vehicle maintenance. They learn time management, financial accountability, and personal independence. Sending a teenager to run real life errands benefits the whole family. Learning happens in kitchens, garages, libraries, conversations, businesses, gardens, churches, trails, communities, and online spaces. It happens whenever we're solving a problem or pursuing an interest, whenever we're building relationships and making sense of the world around us. The challenge is not understanding how to separate home and school, the challenge is understanding that life is the curriculum. When we stop asking, is this schoolwork or is this home life? And we start asking, what is being learned here? We begin to reconnect learning and living. Living is learning, and the quality of your learning drives the quality of your life. Many of us have unconsciously absorbed the idea that school is for learning and home is for living. And think about it, in what ways does society lead us to believe that school life and home life have different roles? Is it because we ask children what did you learn at school today? But we rarely ask what did you learn at home today? What did you learn when you were playing with your friends? What about the importance we put on report cards and grades and diplomas? Why do we say I'm not good at math or I was never good at science as if learning ended when we left school? Maybe it just didn't have an interest in it back then. How often do we make sure homework gets done, but we don't provide opportunities for learning while we're cooking dinner or fixing a bike or budgeting or gardening or caring for siblings? Have you ever heard an adult say it's time to stop playing and get to your schoolwork, even though play is one of the most powerful forms of learning? We separate our days into categories school time, work time, family time, leisure time. But learning gets assigned to just one of those categories, even though it is a part of all of them. So your challenge for this episode is to identify at least one belief you'll change or action you'll take that will help you or maybe your child or children, but help you experience learning everywhere and embrace every opportunity to learn. And here's some ideas to get your brain going in the right direction. At the end of the day, ask yourself, what did I learn today? And include things you learned at work, at home, or in casual conversations. Don't forget to ask your children too, with a focus on learning, not on school, what did you learn from a recent mistake? Choose one everyday activity, such as cooking, shopping, gardening, fixing something, and intentionally notice all the skills and knowledge involved. And after you've completed that, do you have any new skill or knowledge you developed while doing that? Even if you cook all the time. Every time you cook, there's an opportunity for learning something new. Gratitude journaling is very popular right now. What learning are you thankful for today? When we believe learning only happens in school, we miss out on thousands of opportunities to recognize growth and curiosity and discovery in everyday life. But when we begin to see learning as something woven into our everyday life and our relationships, in our play, in our conversations, the world becomes a classroom without walls and every day becomes an opportunity to learn. And when the focus shifts from where you are educated to how you are growing, you find yourself on that path to your element. If you visit the Element is Everything website, you'll find additional resources on today's topic. Invite friends and family to join our community of listeners as we ponder science, perspectives, and strategies around personal accountability, courageous learning, and clear decision making for a sense of connection to ourselves, others, and life.