Whose Definition of Success Is Your Child Following?

In the Element Is Everything Podcast episode "Redefining Success," Terri Novacek sits down with Scott Schimmel, founder and CEO of YouSchool, to explore a question that many parents—and adults—quietly wrestle with throughout their lives:

What does success actually mean?

For generations, success has often been measured by familiar milestones.

Get good grades.

Attend a good college.

Find a respectable career.

Earn a steady income.

While those goals may still matter, many young people today are asking a deeper question:

Will those achievements actually make me happy?

Scott shares his own story of choosing a path that seemed impressive to the adults around him. As a young teenager, he decided he would pursue accounting and finance because people responded positively whenever he talked about it. The path made sense. It earned approval. It gave him direction.

But eventually, he realized the role he had chosen no longer fit who he truly was.

His experience highlights something many parents recognize.

Children often receive messages—intentionally or unintentionally—about what success should look like. Sometimes those messages come from family expectations. Sometimes they come from culture, school, social media, or society at large.

The challenge is that one person's vision of success may not be another person's.

For some people, success means leadership and influence.

For others, it means creativity, flexibility, service, adventure, or meaningful relationships.

The destination isn't always the same.

The Questions That Matter Most

Throughout the conversation, Scott encourages parents and educators to help young people wrestle with questions that often receive less attention than grades, test scores, and college admissions:

• Who are you?
• What matters most to you?
• What problems do you want to solve?
• What are your strengths?
• How do you want to contribute to the world?

These aren't questions that can be answered once and filed away.

They evolve over time.

But learning how to reflect on them is an important part of becoming a self-directed and fulfilled adult.

The Power of a Village

One of the most powerful ideas from this episode is that children should not be expected to discover themselves alone.

Scott describes the importance of having a village of trusted adults who help reflect back what they see in a young person.

Parents play an important role in that process, but they are only one part of the picture.

Teachers, mentors, coaches, family friends, and other caring adults can help students recognize strengths, interests, talents, and character traits that they may not yet see in themselves.

Sometimes one encouraging observation can change the trajectory of a young person's life.

A Different Question for Parents

Many parents say they simply want their children to be happy.

While that intention comes from a place of love, Scott suggests a different approach.

Instead of focusing solely on happiness as an outcome, perhaps we should help young people build lives that are meaningful, purposeful, and aligned with who they are.

Happiness often follows when people feel connected to their strengths, values, and contributions.

For prospective parents exploring educational options, this raises an important question:

Is my child being encouraged to discover who they are, or simply being prepared to meet someone else's expectations?

At Element Education, we believe learning should help students do more than achieve academic success. It should help them understand themselves, develop confidence in their strengths, and explore the many paths available to them.

Because success isn't about becoming someone else.

It's about becoming the best version of yourself.

As Scott reminds us throughout this episode, the most important questions in life don't always have permanent answers.

Sometimes the best answer is simply:

"This is my best answer today."

If you haven't listened to "Redefining Success," this episode offers valuable insights for parents who want to help their children build lives rooted in purpose, self-awareness, and authentic success.